I started another weight loss challenge yesterday on Tampa Bay Moms Group. I always say I’m not going to do anymore because so many people drop out (me included) but I’m a sucker for helping other moms get fit and healthy so when asked, I do!
I feel a little bit like Bikini Body Mommy because I’m actually two weeks ahead- since I started BBM two weeks ago. I haven’t lost anything yet but I am getting into the habit of working out every day which is a huge step for me. Every time I start over I say I’m “determined to finish this time” but don’t. This time I have an accountability partner that’s in it not for me to look sexy but to help me become healthier. It’s kind of ironic that she’s a foodie and travels all over the world eating whatever she wants while I’m eating tons of eggs. But even she has learned that while certain people can eat whatever they want, without some self control and exercise, weight will creep on…especially as we get older.
This has been an eight year battle for me and has caused depression, anxiety, even more self esteem issues than I already had, marital problems and having ‘fat shorts’ in my closet. I’ve seen a scale read 153 lbs with me on it. I know I’ll never be the 103 lbs that I was twenty-one years ago before I had my first child but I also know that 153 lbs is not a healthy weight for my small 5’4″ frame. I’m glad for my accountability partner who reminds me I need to do this for my health (while I’m hiding in my closet yelling “I just wanna be sexy again!!”).
Almost five years ago I created Slacker Fattie and Skinny Bitch. Skinny Bitch was renamed Fit Bitch after a ‘DOH!’ moment that I was supposed to be focusing on being fit and healthy on the inside instead of obsessing about what I looked like on the outside. I came across this picture recently and it was the perfect vision of Fit Bitch chiseling away at Slacker Fattie.
It takes an artist a long time to create a sculpture. It took a while for the weight to pile up and I have to remember that it’s going to take a while for it to come off (see Patience is (not) a Virtue (of mine) that I posted recently). On September 5th, it will be one year since I was rear ended leaving me unable to do much of anything for three months. Although I’m still dealing with neck and back pain, I’m taking my life back. I’m being very careful but can’t sit around anymore watching that number on the scale continue to rise.
I am tired of starting over. But I’m not giving up.