Day 36 Guys beware, female stuff in there!

I woke up this morning excited to start working out again.  I was all set to start getting in three cardio’s a day like Douglas (former trainer) had me do a couple of years ago.  I wasn’t 100% yet, but my blood sugar was fine and I was just left with a little tummy issue.  And then they hit.  Imagine being on the Titanic when it plowed into the ice burg.  I shuffled to the bed, crawled in carefully, pulled the covers up to my chin and wished to die.  Ok, not really but I did want relief…fast.

I’ve tried to get Hubby to run down to CVS and pick me up an epidural but he always tells me no.  I don’t know why they don’t sell them for those of us who suffer from severe cramps each month, someone could make some major dough!

<hang on….Google images break>

Ummm, hmmmm……..

?Now you can relieve menstrual cramps with TENS, which has no side effects and is very effective. This type of treatment uses a stimulator that sends electrical impulses through electrodes on the body. The impulses block the pain impulses to the brain so you don’t feel them. TENS uses the body’s own analgesic systems, and is believed to eliminate the lack of oxygen in the uterine muscle, which is what causes the pain.”  Click here for more.  Oh, and don’t use this if you have a pacemaker.

Ok, now back to my misery.  Thankfully fuse TV had a marathon of the top 100 videos of the 21st century.  We’re only 11 years into it but I guess they needed to fill up a Sunday some how.  The only thing I don’t mind about having cramps is that I get a day off.  This month, however, I didn’t want a day off.  I just had one yesterday thanks to my blood sugar not being cooperative!  I wanted to exercise today dammit!  But instead I’m in my bed, on the computer, watching Nick Cannon and some people I’ve never heard of count down videos.

<hang on, Eminem is on……>

Ok, back to my misery again.  Oh forget it, you get the point.  And apparently my ADD gets worse when I’m cramping, too.  This post is all over the place.  Tomorrow will be a better day and we’ll be getting back to business so be ready!  Skinny Bitch is going to make Slacker Fattie’s ass and Real Crampy Mom will be Real Fit Mom again.

UPDATE– Sooooo, I totally got busted on Facebook by my friend Jaimi.  I “checked in” at Little Caesar’s earlier.  Yes, I was bad.  I ate 2 pieces of pepperoni pizza and 2 breadsticks.  But I drank a bottle of water with it!  Aside from that and the Firehouse ham and cheese on WHEAT sub I had yesterday all I’ve had to eat in the last two days was 1/3 of a bowl of coughramencoughnoodlescough.  I know, there went whatever poundage I may have lost in the last two days.  Bad me!  Bad!  Bad!  Bad me!!!!  But it was yummy!

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Day 2

Which was technically yesterday.  I have been running around like crazy trying to get four kids ready for school this year (my baby’s in kindergarten 😦 ).  Even with all the trips to return some things and buy more I managed to squeeze in my BBL Cardio Axe.

The only downside was not getting in the Boom Boom.  My oldest daughter’s boyfriend requested a back to school dinner with his favorite side dishes that I make plus my daughter’s favorite main dish.  After going to the store, making mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and *Mayonaisse Pork plus a special surprise of *cookie brownies and gathering all the kids school supplies I was BEAT!

Hubby was phenomenal by NOT making me a cocktail even though I said, “Pretty please.”  I made a new rule of no cocktails during the week (no, I’m not an alcoholic) and he chose not to help me break my rule.

Today, I moped around depressed because all my kids are in school and went to a Boo Hoo breakfast with my friend Steffany.  Don’t worry, it wasn’t waffles loaded with butter and syrup (unfortunately).  I had chicken quesadillas with avocado and tomato with a glass of water.  I was going to exercise when I got home but was too full so caught up with Facebook stuff, did some posts on the work site and did a load of dishes.  When the kids get home I’ll fire up the DVD player and get my BBL in for today.  Promise!

Ooooohh, just realized I didn’t do my measurements.  I’ll go do them now and post them after I workout.

ADD moment- forgot to add the “recipes” for the **’s.

*mayo pork- We’re not a mayo family so I use Miracle Whip.  Super easy, combine MW with Italian bread crumbs and smear on boneless porkchops (or chicken).  Bake at 350 for 30 min or until there’s no more pink in the middle.

*cookie browines- Nuther easy peasy one.  Smear (new cooking term, all the rage LOL) cookie dough on the bottom of a pan.  Cover it with a layer of brownie mix.  Cook at 350 until you poke it in the middle and nothing comes off the fork.  (Can you tell I’m not a chef??) 🙂

Living With Adult ADD

(I swiped this from my old blog because I felt it was important to share with Real Fit Mom followers)

I always felt that something in my head wasn’t right. Well, there’s a lot in there that isn’t right, but I’ve come to find out some are not my fault.

I was sitting in the doctor’s office with one of my kids (why and which one, I don’t remember) and saw a sign on the wall. It said that if I could answer yes to the questions below, I should talk to my doctor about ADD. I read each of the five questions and answered yes to… all of them. All five? Wow. So when the doctor came in, I asked her about it. Her reply was, “You don’t have ADD. You just have three children. It’s normal.”

Huh. What’s normal about having a short attention span at 31? What’s normal about not remembering why you walked into a room…several times a day? What’s normal about forgetting that you put your kid in timeout? And why you put him/her in there?

I found this checklist while doing research:

Adult ADD Symptom Test:

If you experience more than 10 points on this adult ADD self symptom test, Attention Deficit Disorder is likely present.

  • An internal sense of anxiety – I have this at times but it’s not frequent.
  • Impulsive spending habits – Money slips through my hands and often I don’t remember what I bought.
  • Frequent distractions during sex – I’m going to leave this one alone!
  • Frequently misplace the car keys, your purse or wallet or other day-to-day items – I never know where my keys, phone, and glasses are even though I try hard to put them in the same place every time.
  • Lack of attention to detail – It depends on what it is. When I color, which I love to do, I’m very detailed. On most other things, not so much.
  • Family history of ADD, learning problems, mood disorders or substance abuse problems – One of my biological brothers has ADD and my biological mom and I both have mood disorders.
  • Trouble following the proper channels or chain of commands – This one is very frustrating.
  • An attitude of “read the directions when all else fails” – BIG TIME! If the directions are long or confusing, it seems easier to try it on my own first.
  • Frequent traffic violations – Because I don’t want to waste money, I try hard to drive correctly.
  • Impulsive job changes – This happened when I used to work.
  • Trouble maintaining an organized work and/or home environment – If you could only see my house on a day to day basis, it’s not pretty.
  • Chronically late or always in a hurry – Very true. And this isn’t because I have 4 kids. I try hard to be organized but I find myself forgetting important things we need while we’re out.
  • Frequently overwhelmed by tasks of daily living – Like I said above, you should see my kitchen, laundry pile, and playroom.
  • Poor financial management and frequent late bills – I can’t balance a checkbook to save my life.
  • Procrastination – I’ll get to this one later. Seriously, I will… no, not right now. Later.
  • Spending excessive time at work due to inefficiencies – I find so many things that need to be done that I wind up not getting anything done.
  • Inconsistent work performance – See above.
  • Sense of underachievement – I think my Self Esteem blog says it all.
  • Frequent mood swings – Ask my family about this one. Can we say Lexapro?
  • Trouble sustaining friendships or intimate relationships – I’m 35 and have less than 10 friends.
  • A need to seek high stimulation activities – Which is why exercising gives me a natural high.
  • Tendency toward exaggerated outbursts – Nu uh! Yeah, ask Hubby about this one.
  • Transposing numbers, letters, words – SO frustrating! I speed read, too, which means I often have to go back and reread paragraphs because I missed something. I transpose numbers on a daily basis which is probably part of the reason I can’t balance a checkbook.
  • Tendency toward being argumentative – I am NOT! ‘nuff said.
  • Addictive personality toward food, alcohol, drugs, work and/or gambling – This is probably why I gained 20 pounds in 4 months. And, I like my cocktails thank you very much! I am able to limit myself which is a very good thing.
  • Tendency to worry needlessly and endlessly – This goes above and beyond the normal Mommy worrying.
  • “Thin-skinned”- having quick or exaggerated responses to real or imagined slights – I’ll just say that I’m extremely fortunate to have a patient and understanding husband.

http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=238

I know pretty much everyone can relate to one or more of these. However, to relate to each and every one, and to the severity of which I relate, is very frustrating for me. When I was 8 months pregnant with Maisie, I went to counseling. I told my counselor that I tried to convince 2 doctors that I had Adult ADD. After two sessions, she agreed with me. I went to my family doctor and, though he was still very skeptical, he agreed to write me a prescription. The problem with that was I was pregnant. Then, I was nursing. So I was unable to see if the Adderall would help until several months later. I remember my doctor telling me that if I did have ADD, the medicine would work right away. I thought this meant in less than a week, you know, so it would have time to get in my system. So, I took one and then went about my day. Fifteen minutes – yes, minutes not days – I have an urge to clean the entire house in an hour! If that’s not proof I have ADD,
I don’t know what is!

I know that the Adderall would work much better if I would remember to take it twice a day. In fact, I’ve been off of it for a few months and just took one a little while ago. Oh, boy can I feel it kicking in right now! My Sony Ericsson 580i has 5 alarms on it. When I finish this post, I’ll go set two of them to remind me to take the Adderall. Better yet, hang on while I do it right now……………ok, done!

I get the generic version, so I take 10 mg two times a day. Since it’s an amphetamine, I can’t get refills. I have to go to the doctor’s office every month, show my ID, and sign a copy of the Rx. If I lose it on the way to the pharmacy, I’m screwed. I also have to show my ID when I pick it up from the pharmacy. And no, don’t ask me if I’ll sell them to you. They’re big on college campuses especially around exam time as they help you focus. I assured my doctor that I would be taking all of mine.

So, hopefully now that I’m back on Adderall, those things on that list up there will get better. Feel free to ask me every now and then if I remembered to take it and if it is helping.

Back to Adderall

I’ve come to the conclusion that taking Adderall is a must for the rest of my life- or until I develop Alzheimer’s and won’t remember to care anymore.

I tried calling in to get my Rx but since I hadn’t hung out with my doctor in 10 months they insisted we make a date. So there I sat listening to my amazing doctor sniffle while his tummy rumbled telling him how bad things had gotten not being in Adderall and how my memory issues had worsened. Unfortunately he pointed out very clearly that my memory issues were not related to ADD. He said, “Neurologist” I said, “Next.” We did decide to try upping my dose. He suggested taking two in the morning and one in the afternoon. I told him I might be better off taking one in the morning and two in the afternoon since all four kids are home, dinner has to be made/cleaned up, baths, and homework all have to be done. Mornings are very quiet with only the four year old at home.

Not only did I have to sign for my Rx, I also had to sign a separate form letting me know of their new policy “…due to the possible risk of addiction, drug interactions, and side effects these medications require careful monitoring by your physician…..must make an appointment every three months so your physician can closely monitor your health and safety….” Why do I take this stuff again?

Oh yeah! Because my life is a mess! Which doc confirmed yesterday as well. He let me know he doesn’t normally prescribe Adderall in adults. If he has an ADD patient with a job that requires lots of projects, details, deadlines, etc he’ll hook him up so he doesn’t get fired. But if he has an ADD patient with a more simple job he tells him to just deal. My life with four kids, trying to get fit, work, baseball, dance lessons, being a maid to 5 is apparently complicated enough to warrant being on Adderall.  My house is cleaner and I work out way more often when on it which doc thought was great!  🙂

Note to SAHM’s who Google ADD and memorize the symptoms in hopes of pulling one over on a doctor so you can get a quick high or appetite suppressant- don’t go to mine. He won’t buy it. Kinda makes me feel honored I’m on his list of amphetamine users!

Haha, as I’m finishing this post my alarm is going off to take my Adderall- only problem is I forgot to pick it up yesterday.

image from http://www.everydayhealth.com/drugs/adderall-for-attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder-adhd/review

ADD- Ditsy or Debilitating

Looking back to my high school and college years I realize that I appeared to be very ditsy. It seems the older I got the ditsier I appeared and soon became the brunt of blond jokes even though I’m a brunette. It wasn’t until I was eight months pregnant with my last baby that I was finally diagnosed with Adult ADD.  The majority of the time I’m able to laugh at myself when my friends poke fun at me, but there are times that I just sit down and cry- usually in the closet or shower where no one can see or hear me.

What people don’t understand is how debilitating ADD can be. Have you ever put you children in time out and forgotten about them? What about when your husband comes home, the kids tell him they were in time out but when he asks why you can’t remember?   It’s not just little things that most people do.  If you look at ADD symptoms most people do one or two of them.  But when you do all or most of those things it’s down right debilitating. I’ve lost friends because I don’t remember to send them messages on Facebook. I’ve ticked people off by forgetting to post something on the website I work for. I irritate my husband daily by never finishing cleaning one room. It was bad enough when my older kids started picking up on my little oddities but now the younger two are starting to see it. My 6 year old son gets in my face when I don’t answer him because I’m so tuned into a show on TV, a good book or something on the internet. I can’t stand editing anything I write because I see the evidence of my ADD so clearly it’s as if there is a little guy with a megaphone shouting, “SHE HAS ADD!”

Busy Mom

Just yesterday a friend of mine was in a store talking to the owner. The owner mentioned that I was supposed to to bring in my carpet cleaner for her to borrow but hadn’t done it yet. In my defense, I think, my friend told her I have ADD and forget to do things a lot.  I can’t be upset because it’s true.  But, I hate it.  I hate that I start to clean the kitchen, go in the playroom to put something away then start cleaning in there.  Then I take something into my room then start cleaning my room.  I never get anything done.  I hate that I tell someone I’m going to do something or send them information but forget by the time I get home.  What’s even worse is when a friend will come over to help, gets things done quickly then says how easy it was.  It’s not easy at all when your brain wanders so much that you can’t complete simple tasks.  I feel like a bad wife, bad friend and especially a bad mom.

I hate having ADD.  I hate not feeling normal.  I hate using ADD as an excuse.  I hate that I can’t fix it.  I take Adderall but usually don’t remember to take it.  And what’s really bad is that I have an alarm on my phone to remind me!  It goes off and I press snooze because I’m in the middle of something.  I’ll hit snooze 4-5 times then eventually turn it off, usually never getting up to take it. When I do remember to take it on a regular basis the symptoms are definitely lessened but don’t go away completely.

It took going to two doctors and a psychologist to finally get diagnosed but I did.  I researched ADD a lot, took several quizzes and talked to the shrink several times before pushing my doctor to put me on Adderall.  If any of this describes your life, not if you do some of this every once in a while but if it affects your daily life, I strongly urge you to talk to your doctor.  Don’t let them brush you off either.  Keep bugging them until they listen to you.

Image by FunDraw

Life goes on…with Adderall

Blotchy memory, wandering thoughts, making lists of lists- this is a small glimpse into my life with Adult ADD. I’ve been off and on Adderall for three years. Sometimes we’re on a tight budget (self pay! self pay!). Sometimes I forget to call it in. Sometimes I forget to pick it up. Many times I forget to take it.

This time I’m determined to stick with it. I have two alarms on my cell phone to remind me to take Adderall twice a day. My doctor recommended 8 am and 12 pm. I take it at 9:30 am and 3:30 pm because I’m not a morning person and a night owl.

So yesterday I drove around for twenty minutes trying to find my doctor’s office. In my defense they moved five months ago and I’ve only been there three times since. Also, I left my GPS at home which stunk because it’s saved in my addresses.

After finally finding it I showed my ID, signed the photocopy, and carefully took it to the closest CVS. Adderall is an amphetamine and is sold in clubs and on college campuses across the United States. Because of this I only get one every month and only I can pick it up. The pharmacy has to write my driver’s license number on their form.

All of this is worth it because once I start taking it regularly for at least a week I notice a big difference in myself. My memory is still unreliable but not as much. I’m more focused and able to get things done.

I feel better when I take Adderall regularly. There are times that I feel like a bad wife and mom when I can’t focus, can’t remember to sign papers, can’t remember to send things in for projects, can’t remember to get my son a glass of chocolate milk.

Here’s a small example of what I mean: Last night I started my bath. I was almost finished with the book I was currently reading and I’d left my towel in the kitchen. I walked right past my books, past my towel and spotted my Adderall still in the bag. I took one then headed back to the tub. Half way there I remembered my book so I turned around and grabbed one. Half way back I remembered my towel and turned around to get it. Twenty minutes later I was relaxing in the tub glad to have Adderall in the cabinet again so these moments will be reduced.

Wow! Day 1 of Adderall.

Post Adderall