Okay, that’s long enough. I’m not sad. I am a little disappointed I was never able to find someone to create a cartoon character of her so we could have a proper funeral, though. Here, we’ll mummify her.
How do I know she’s dead?
It’s the middle of the day. I just ate lunch (including a handful of mint M&M’s). I’m in my workout clothes. I just wrapped up a blog post and decided to take a “powder my nose” break. I decided to get on the scale which I NEVER do. The scale is strictly for the morning, after I powder my nose and before I put clothes on activity. Today I broke that rule. I’m impatient and don’t feel like waiting until the morning to write this. Apparently I’m on a blogging roll thanks to my Relentless Challenge moms. Anyway, I took my tennis shoes off (no need to add that extra weight) and stepped on the scale. The numbers 132 flashed at me.
On Halloween I hit 129.6 lbs for the first time in years and have seen it off and on since then. I’ve stayed under 133 even without working out much but with eating better. I even allowed alcohol back into my diet a bit. So with not exercising regularly, allowing myself alcohol on occasion, having pumpkin pie, apple pie (at Thanksgiving, not all the time) and even eating some pizza now and again, I am still under 133.
I’m officially declaring Slacker Fattie dead. There will be no tears. There will be no ceremony or organ music playing. She’s kicked to the curb.
Now I know life can toss some curve balls. I’m perfectly aware that she could tear through the gauze, push off the heavy sarcophagus lid and dig through six feet of healthy food and workouts and haunt my progress.
But she’s been gone for over three months- once the 130’s reappeared on the scale. That’s a long time for her to be gone. I’m comfortable calling the time of death- Fall of 2015- and notifying the family- Fit Bitch shed a single tear. So, goodbye Slacker Fattie. You are dead, gone and buried. I won’t miss you.