Pull me by the hair please!!

No, perverts this isn’t a sexual post. But I do sell sex toys for a living soooo……

I’m lazy–plain and simple. I’d rather sit on Facebook, my mommy website or work on my Pure Romance business Pure Romance than get off my cushiony ass. Even with Josh and now Grapes, Gripes and Gratitude (I’ll add your link when I get on an actual computer) hounding me every day I’m still lazy.

Do you know when I really want to workout? When I’m getting in the tub. Why? Because we have super huge mirrors that I can’t hide from that show all of my flabby flab. I’m sooooo freakin’ tired of the flabby flab!!

Several years ago Hubby jokingly said he’d divorce me if I ever got fat. I think it’s time for him to call his attorney.

I know, I know, I’m not “fat” but I have a lot of extra fat (for me) and it needs to go away. So I think reinforcements are in need. Maybe I should just call an attorney and tell him Hubby is divorcing me. Mmmmmm, nah. Takes the scare tactic out of it. Plus I know he’d never divorce me. Who would clean the house and cook dinner every night?

The new wife of course.

I suck at cleaning and cooking for those who don’t know me- like the pervs who clicked on this when they Googled “hair pulling” if they took the time to read this far.

So I’m at a loss. I don’t know how to get myself up and working out.

Oh, hahaha, the hair pulling thing. Shit, I really need to get up off my lazy ass when my alarm goes off twice a day to remind me to take my Adderall and I swipe it but never actually get up.

So, would someone like to come over every day and pull me by the hair out of my chair so I’ll get up and workout?


Ok. Darn. And I thought I was actually going to have to break a sweat.

Kidding. Tomorrow’s the day. Grab a handful and pull hard.

Slacker Fattie is winning. Come on Skinny Bitch! Get your dukes out!!! Shut her up once and for all!!


8 thoughts on “Pull me by the hair please!!

  1. I am not one of those pervs that found you by searching hair pulling. I am one that has been following you for a while so, your title didn’t draw in this perv I was already here. I am sure you aren’t as lazy as you say. Kids are a lot of work so, parents are always tired. I know it’s easier said than done but you need more you time. I get up really early for my me time so, I will be over at 4:00 am to pull your hair (tell hubby not to shoot). And PS…when I am not at work I may buy something from your site.

  2. Great that you’ve found the motivation I’m still searching for mine! I’ve heard just adding a bit of light walking to your routine can make all the difference too! Must be hard to find time for working out alongside raising kids and running a Sex Shop, good on you!

    • Funny you should mention walking…….stay tuned for my next post! I’ve never heard of SimplyPleasure.com. I’ll have to check it out. Since I only do parties at night I have time during the day…..I just don’t wanna!!!! hahaha

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